clawed my way to victory

I had an interesting experience at Dave and Busters on Saturday night. I got bored with the arcade games, so I decided to try my luck at the claw stuffed animal machine thingy. You know what I'm talking about: Those frustrating glass cases with all the wonderful stuffed animals and the most ineffective grabbing claw ever created. Most people think these things should have a big sign on them that says, "Don't bother. You're not getting anything. Just drop your coins in and walk away."



Well I had heard some "tips" on how to beat these things (don't ask my why such information would even be important to me), so I decided to give it a try. To get to the point, I went 14 for about 20. That's 14 crappy stuffed animals out of 20 tries! Not bad odds... I was doing so great that the lady had to come and keep filling the machine.

So I thought it would be cool to let my readers (both of them) in on my experienced tips. Here they are:

1. Don't look for what you want, look for what you can get.

-Most people approach the machine and look for a toy they would really want and go for that. This is problematic because what you want might not actually be accessible. It's better to actually win something than try for what you want and never get it. It's best to survey the pile and see what is ripe for the picking. The next tips help you decide which is best.

2. Go for a toy that's resting softly on the top and not under any other toys.

-We all know how weak those claws are, and that there is no chance they will pull anything up that's under something else. So try to go for something that has no part under anything else.

3. Go for a toy that's in the middle.

-Since the claw has such terrible range, you have to go for something that's toward the middle of the pile. The toys around the edge are probably too close to the glass to grab right.

4. Go for a toy with "grabable shape."

-Something long and skinny will probably be difficult to grab. Look for something with a size and shape that would be perfect for the claw. Something with a big head or body would work great. Also, check to see if you can grab the string or tag of a toy.

5. Go for a toy near the edge of the chute.

-There may be something close to the hole that you can just nudge with the claw and it will drop in the chute. Then you don't even have to worry about the claw and it's terrible grabbing power.

6. Go for a toy that's up high.

-These claws have terrible range, so a lower toy might be out of reach of the claw. Then you're screwed and there goes 50 cents.


7. Take your time.

-You usually have a time limit before the claw automatically goes, so use the whole time if you need it. Go to the side of the machine to check your angle to make sure you get the perfect grab. There's nothing worse than hitting the button and finding out you had the right "left-to-right" position but weren't deep enough or shallow enough.

That should give you a good start. Have fun cleaning out the machines. Fight the power!